All's Quiet on the Home Front

Jeremelon and the berrykin are currently winging their way over the Rockies to visit the grandparents in Phoenix.  I REALLY hope it's going well.  Their flight was delayed two hours, so we all went and grabbed lunch rather than just dropping them off (Beee came along to drive so I wouldn't have to worry about it while crying uncontrollably).  Berrykin was falling asleep in the car on the way back to the airport, though, so we were hopeful he'd fall asleep pretty quickly.  I packed him all kinds of snacks and toys to keep him occupied, and Jeremelon loaded up his new (used) PSP (bought with credits from trading in all his old Xbox 360 stuff) with Mickey Mouse Clubhouse episodes and Spyro.  Even if Berrykin doesn't sleep, he'll have plenty to do!

And now I'm sitting here in a quiet apartment trying to figure out what to do with myself.  It's been three and a half years since I had quiet!  I'd forgotten how restful it is. :)  But every time I turn around, there's a reminder of all the noise that should be filling up the space...and the noise-maker who isn't here.  And then I want to break down and cry.  I've done very well so far!  I only cried a little when I said goodbye; Berrykin was too excited to say hi to the security officers to notice I wasn't coming along.  That was a blessing, I suppose; he's been really big on holding my hand clenched in his lately.  But I definitely had tears leaking out of my sunglasses as Beee and I high-tailed it out of the airport.  I haven't cried yet since we've been home, but I'm sure that's short-lived.  As soon as it's bedtime, or I go to clean his room, or...whatever I do that doesn't involve staring with extreme focus at an electronic device, I'm sure I'll have a big ole cry.

They're going to be gone about nine days.  The longest we've been apart was when I attended a friend's birth as a doula back in 2012.  That was 55 hours, and I was too involved in what I was doing to notice.  Since then, the longest I've been away from him was a nine-hour class two Saturdays in a row.  99% of my days, the only time I don't see him is when one of us is asleep. 

This will be good for both of us, I'm sure.  I have a giant to-do list for these nine days - mostly writing, writing, and more writing - that will keep me occupied.  I'll be productive, hopefully get my schedule fixed in a good, healthy way that will be beneficial to everybody.  I'll get to SLEEP IN and only wake up when *I* want to.  I can read or work or write or play or go out into the world without thinking about anybody but myself.  Meanwhile, Berrykin gets to go to the aquarium, the zoo, no doubt all kinds of shopping, and spend lots and lots of time with his granddad, who never fails to be super excited to see him on a daily basis, no matter how many days he's seen him before.  And he gets to ride on a plane and go for a loooong drive back (which probably won't be fun...but it's different...right?) with Daddy and Granddad.  Boys' time!  No Mommy allowed!  Plus, I'm sure Gran and Granddad will buy him more stuff than he has room for on his shelves, and that'll make him happy. :)

I just hope he doesn't miss me as much as I'm gonna miss him. :(  I think Jeremelon's plan is to wear him out as much as possible so that he doesn't notice Mommy's not around for bedtime...

...I miss my baby.